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Elibebe Koker
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Is it even easy to let go of a feeling?
It's important you know loving someone allows him/her to go into the core of your heart. Instantly, you feel a burst of emotions. Hence, the person's thoughts become overwhelming. You begin to think about the person at the passing of every hour. The proximity of love to obsession becomes obvious. It's management of love that allows you to control this feeling, and it only comes with experience. This is why naive individuals or first-time lovers fall into obsession instead of love; they just can't control the burst. I have always argued that love doesn't take anything; however, I have come to understand that love takes away your somewhat invulnerability. Humans are naturally susceptible to some extent, so I used the “somewhat” to reveal our partial invulnerability. Once you allow a person into your heart, you become completely susceptible. Love doesn't admit absolute independence, it only allows codependency. That's why your lover's unhappiness thwarts your happiness.
With all these things being said about love, can one unlove a person? Our hearts are very stubborn, although they are the first to recognize the fallout. The heart is tenacious; it's somewhat synonymous with the “mind” in this context. Memories are inextricable, however; they can be repressed. Believe me, cover memories. After the fallout, you're likely to find someone else, who becomes your new lover. The new lover's memories cover the old lover's memories but the former's memories don't kill the latter's. The love for your old lover is deeply anchored in the memories you both shared. Ignition will occur any time you see him/her. This why you should distance yourself from your ex when you're in a new relationship.
It's true people declare their hatred for their ex; however, these are people whose hearts fail them each time they want to move on. You can't unlove someone you once loved; the love may decline but it never undergoes a final termination.
What do you think???
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About the Author
Ifenaike Ifedapo Ayomipo is a Nigerian writer whose works have been published or are forthcoming on The Quills, The Transit Lit Magazine, Naija Mad Hotstars, Kalahari Review, IceFloe Press, CovidHQ Africa, Shallow Tales Review, Institutionalized Review, Whetstone Magazine and elsewhere. Also, he's a promising Educationist and public speaker.
